这些歪果仁竟一本正经在讨论C罗扣篮能力……

你知道什么是看得见摸得着的蛋疼吗？来文内寻找答案吧！...



#以下评论皆来自reddit

由@AlanWake44 整理

 C罗越位在先，搞怪排球破门



[–]【Manchester United】demonictoaster 461 points 15 hours ago

"Ronaldo what the hell was that??"

"You say Volley-Ball when cross comes in"

"Volley THE ball!"

"I'm not hearing the difference"

“票哥你这是在干嘛？？”

“你说传中进来的时候就排球啊”

“我说的是凌空！”

“没觉得有什么不同”

[–]AlbumTalarium 762 points 15 hours ago

Before the conspiracies go up:

He wasn't carded because he was called offside before the attempt

在有人无脑黑之前先说一下：

C罗没吃牌是因为他排球之前就被吹越位了

[–]【Juventus】theultimatebr0 397 points 15 hours ago

Uefanaldo /s

欧足联的干骡子

[–]【Internazionale】iamreddy44 262 points 15 hours ago

hugs the ball , not bale

宁愿抱个球都不抱贝尔

[–]【Real Madrid】IamAMiningEngineer 126 points 15 hours ago

Ahem, I beg your pardon?

咳咳，你说什么来着？



[–]【Manchester United】Zxcvbnm123_ 180 points 15 hours ago

Clearly slapping him in the guts for having the audacity to take the shot himself

显然是大圣胆大包天自己射门不肯传球，C罗照着他肚子就是一掌

[–]highlightsbot[S] 338 points 15 hours ago

Ronaldo to NBA confirmed.

仿佛看到了NBA新科状元！

[–]【Juventus】theultimatebr0 108 points 15 hours ago

Ronaldo to Golden State to replace Steph

C罗加盟勇士顶替库昊



[–]【Galatasaray】BrtGP 61 points 15 hours ago

Only question is would he hug Klay Thompson?

只有一个问题，抱吗？

[–]【Liverpool】delayT3 77 points 15 hours ago

Could probably dunk better than Curry

C罗的扣篮说不定真比库里好

[–]【Manchester United】yiyiyiyi 389 points 15 hours ago

I don't think he was genuinely trying to cheat there, he knew he was offside.

我觉得他不是真的要作弊，他知道自己越位了。

[–]【Arsenal】turdburglersc 492 points 15 hours ago

thanks detective

谢谢了新一君

[–]sumhope 163 points 15 hours ago

"If he hadn't of used his hands and was on side, that would of been a goal" - Michael Owen

“如果他不是用手而且没越位的话，那就是个进球了”——英格兰徐阳

[–]【Manchester United】DatGuyRich 198 points 12 hours ago

The sooner City get rid of Yaya the better. He is such a heffalump

亚亚图雷对于曼城来说就是早走早超生。太懒了

[–]【Montreal Impact】Atheldemic 112 points 12 hours ago

Yaya Toure heat map this game

亚亚图雷这场比赛的热点图



[–]【Bayern München】DragonTamerMCT 672 points 12 hours ago

Summary of the game

全场回顾



[–]【Poland】gacus1010 1018 points 12 hours ago

I would demote Man city to polish ekstraklasa for this performance.

曼城这种表现我觉得应该全队拉去踢波甲联赛。

[–]【Matlock Town】little_legz 414 points 12 hours ago

Like seriously. They didn't attack at all

真心的。曼城完全不会进攻啊

[–]【Arsenal】swissking 355 points 12 hours ago

80th minute and they were passing around in their half..real embarrassing performance.

80分钟了他们还在自家半场倒脚……真他妈太丢人了。

[–]【Juventus】theultimatebr0 212 points 15 hours ago

Can we discuss Sergio Aguero's performance over the two legs? Very anonymous and not like him self. Would have expected more from him.

不讨论下阿圭罗两回合的表现吗？隐身的都不像阿圭罗了。本以为他会更显眼才对。

[–]【Poland】gacus1010 100 points 15 hours ago

Same with KDB.

德布劳内也是。

[–]【Wales】Emptysighsandwine 174 points 15 hours ago

He wasn't anonymous, he was noticeably bad.

丁丁并没有隐身，他是看得见摸得着的蛋疼。



[–]【Real Madrid】lord_iceman 392 points 13 hours ago

Leicester and Atletico have shown us that money can't buy everything. C'mon Real. Let's beat City tonight and add to the sequence of the underdogs beating the uber rich clubs this year.

莱斯特和马竞已经告诉了我们金钱买不到一切的道理。皇马加油啊，今晚把曼城干了，咱也来一段黑马战胜大金主的故事。

[–]【Manchester City】GJXN1990 302 points 13 hours ago

...wait a minute

……你给我等一下

[–]RedAnonym 201 points 13 hours ago*

Man City is all Arab Money; while Real Madrid is built upon the sweat and blood of hard working Spanish farmers and labourers. I know who I am backing today. C'mon City!

曼城都是石油钱，皇马的钱都是西班牙农民工的血汗钱啊。我知道今晚我支持谁了，曼城加油！



[–]【Manchester City】SlashmanX 1087 points 11 hours ago

At least I won 820 quid on a random bet

起码我乱下注赢了820镑



（这货买了上下半场各打一次门柱，孔帕尼被罚下或者被换下，赔率是1赔41，买了20，赢了820……）

[–]【Birmingham City】essentialatom 670 points 11 hours ago*

2005: Liverpool vs. Milan. Two years later, Liverpool vs. Milan.

2009: Barcelona vs. Man Utd. Two years later, Barcelona vs. Man Utd.

2014: Real Madrid vs. Atletico Madrid. Two years later, Real Madrid vs. Atletico Madrid.

And before you say anything - yes, I am saying this is a conspiracy.

Edit: Lots of valuable work being done on this, folks. Keep the speculation coming. We'll nail these shapeshifting, swivel-eyed UEFA bastards yet.

2005年：利物浦 vs 米兰。2年后，利物浦 vs 米兰。

2009年：巴萨 vs 曼联。2年后，巴萨 vs 曼联。

2014年：皇马 vs 马竞。2年后，皇马 vs 马竞。

恩说在你们前面——是的，这里面绝对有阴谋。

编辑：恩这里头我可是做了很多工作啊朋友们。大家都往外传啊，到时候一定要把这群一肚子坏水的欧足联官员干掉。



[–]【Juventus】Juve313 261 points 11 hours ago

Judging the pattern:

2009-2005=4 years

2014-2009=5 years

2020-2014 = 6 years

So the finalist of 2020 will be the finalists of 2022. Gonna bet on it.

看一下这里面的规律哦：

2009-2005=4年

2014-2009=5年

2020-2014=6年

所以2020年的决赛对阵双方也是2022年的对阵双方。可以赌一下。

[–]【Birmingham City】essentialatom 122 points 11 hours ago

Thank you very much for your data. I think UEFA need to answer some extremely serious questions about this.

感谢上面2位大神整理出来的数据。我觉得欧足联需要非常严肃地回答一下这些问题了。

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